February 11, 2020 Being Anastazia 0 Comments

Love or relationship is a very complex topic, sometimes we are spot on and sometimes well... we never quite get the other person...
I have been in a lot of relationships and I would tell you like a girl, a lot of people won't be open to saying that they have seen a lot of people but today is your lucky day because this girl lost her shame nerve a long time ago

Dating is not quite a strange topic if you ask me, it is only strange because we try so much to avoid it and pretend it doesn’t exist or worse shame each other in case anyone opens up about it. One thing I never quite understood is why it should be a matter of shame to a woman but of praise to a man but that is a topic for another article.
I have so many friends come to me saying something about their relationships that they do not quite understand and I often wonder... I mean it shouldn’t be that hard, if you really like a person, somethings should come obvious to you so I decided to make up a list of things that YOU SHOULD NEVER DO TO SOMEONE YOU LIKE/LOVE

1. Give them all your baggage

Yes! I am going to go straight to the point with this one, everyone has problems, everyone would like superman/ woman to swoop in to save the day but that is exactly where we go wrong. You see you should always be your partner’s hero, you shouldn’t be the only one that needs saving,  try to be independent solve your own problems and of course having that someone to hold you up is a great gift but don’t lay too much on them that it is no longer your problem but theirs.
I feel like I should give an example to make my point... let’s start with the mother of all “money” say you need some cash for something and yes your partner can afford to help so you ask for help... it’s the normal thing to do, right? Well.... not really, first of all, you need to know despite you dating each one of you is their own person unless you are married and have an agreement then each one of your earnings belongs to one person, not every problem needs a hero and not every money problem is that big. Ask for help when necessary.

2. Do the Little Things Yourself

A little bit like the one before, think of this, you need to go to deposit some money but you are lazy so you ask your partner to do it, you need food so you ask your partner to cook, you need clean clothes so you ring your partner up you need some laundry service, you need to get somewhere so you ask your partner to take you, none of these points are bad but too much of everything is harmful. When you lay all your baggage on one person eventually they get tired, they hurt and they feel used and irrelevant.

3. Never Throw Them Under The Bus/ Let Them Get Thrown Under The Bus

You get in a little trouble so what you do is blame it on your partner to save yourself. You had to go to a party, you get there late so you blame it on your girl for taking too long to prepare, example too small? Ok see this... you don’t want to go out with friends so you blame it on your partner “they don’t want me to go out tonight” I always call B.S on that.
Doing so can affect how your partner is looked at and that can really put a weigh on your relationship but worse, if someone was attacking your partner and you just stood there, well let’s just say if I was your girl then it’s over!
Have their back, even when they are wrong don’t give the public the satisfaction, people will always try to come in between. Scolding can come later, first is to keep the united front.

4. Never Bring Up Gender

This is my personal worst favourite, ever had someone throw at you what is between their legs? Such a turn off! right?
Men never say “I am a man, blah blah” and women never say “I am a woman blah blah”
If you have to argue then shoot points not sex! #itsamajorturnoff

5. Think Before Thought For

I didn’t think about it, ah man do I hate that statement, what do you mean?

I always say, being thoughtful is always there if you like someone enough, you don’t need anyone to change your batteries to get you thinking about them.
It’s always in what you talk about, don’t do anything you have to think twice to do, it’s probably wrong! So stop texting some guy/ girls if you have to delete the conversation after. If she is talking too much about a doll that means get her one if he wears the same shirt every day instead of mocking and crushing get him a new one.

6. Be out of touch till the end of the day/Wait for them to contact you first

I always wonder how my mom and dad used to do it, with no smartphones, they used to send each other recorded tapes to hear each other and as much as that was so sweet and romantic, after a taste of technology I don’t think even they would agree to go back there so this thing about speaking to each other in the morning and night is really a lie. You hold your phone, if you care enough you would check your texts if you don’t, you may want to step back and think that relationship through
On the flip side of the coin, if you are one of the people that wait to be contacted first, drop it because while you are waiting, someone else is contacting them.


When the honeymoon period of a new relationship is over, all hell breaks loose, you fight over random things, that is completely normal. The key to moving past that is to always listen to the other no matter how dumb what they have to say sounds. You always have to know just because something is small to you doesn’t mean it’s the same to the other person so LISTEN.
You want to introduce them to someone but they aren’t ready, instead of fighting, forcing them, listen to them. Get to the bottom of the situation.

8. Don’t point fingers

You did this, I did that never helps anybody. Pointing fingers only makes your partner exhausted, they will feel like you always have something to complain about and would check out super fast on you

9. Don’t let each other stay mad

Being stubborn especially in conflicts is no alien but you always have to see the bigger picture. Fix a problem now and let it go, don’t stay mad for 2 more days and probably not even speak to each other just because, that is unnecessary!
Apologize even when you feel you are right, if you are calm, that is all that matters. Talk to the other person. Never let each other stay overnight mad at each other.