Birthday Month : Realities

Sometimes we just tend to forget what it is that life trully means... so it's my birthday month and this one is for me

I don't know if many of you can relate... But i went to an exchange youth program last month and it kind of changed my life, i realized that i always looked at myself as a happy, charming and wise person (yes roll your eyes haters) but at the end of the youth program we had a meditating session... i broke into tears when i actually started reflecting on what and who I really was... one thing i realized was that i was filled with hate, anger and grudges that i did not really think were there... see this is the thing, when you are a charming person everyone just assumes u don't get hurt, when no one sees you cry they all assume that your tear ducts have been plugged out of your eyes... I learnt a lot of things throughout the 21 years of walking on this earth
1. It is NOT OK not to BE HAPPY, the moment you sense this is being taken away from you...walk away no matter how painful the first few steps might be it's for the best and you need to accept that. Am not saying you shouldnt fight for what you love or believe in am just saying look at the situation as you weren't in it.. and at the end decide is it really worth it? Clinging on to something that only you have a plan for?
2. Accept that you can not fix everything , not everything is within your control, worrying is like a rocket chair, it gives you something to do, but takes you no where, i got late for my flight from Jo'berg to Tanzania, the me before this meditation would have panicked so hard that planes would not take off, i'd cry out of fear even... but all I did was laugh at the situation and said to my friend...well at least we got an extra day in Jo'berg
3. It is NOT OK to call for help only when you need help... u shouldn't use people like that, try to be there... yes I'm terrible at communication but I want you all to know that I care and am Lazy AF my phone is almost never with me but the moment I see your text or missed call i will get back to you... But i get hurt too.. people use me all the time... friends call and come over when they need my advice or help... but this is the part that i go back to  POINT NUMBER 1....
there is so much to share, i figured not everyday is filledwith smiles and hence this post...
leave a comment if you relate or have an add on this post...